1. Get an XB model that suites your taste, riding style and affordability that is in good mechanical and running condition.
2. Purchase or download a factory maintenance manual (I can't stress this one enough). Go through it and familiarize yourself with basic maintenance procedures, required tools and consumable items (oil, spark plugs, etc.).
3. Cruise the many Buell-related boards, learning about recognizing, diagnosing and correcting the most common problems and/or wear issues associated with your model. The XBs received upgrades through the years, but many of us who have the older models have not had any issues.
4. Learn to be self-sufficient with regards to your bike maintenance. Change your oil regularly and correct minor problems as soon as you notice them.
If you follow the above, you should be able to confidently purchase and enjoy any of the 03+ XB models. Regular maintenance is a breeze and relatively affordable compared to many other brands.
All that said, one of the main caveats of Buell ownership is parts availability at some dealerships who either don't stock Buell parts on their shelves and/or are not as friendly or accommodating to Buell riders. You'll quickly learn how well your local HD shop supports Buells, and where to order online if necessary.
You can visit forums related to just about any bike manufacturer and model and read about problems they have (and they all do), but keep in mind that for every posting by someone about a problem with their Buell, there are hundreds if not thousands of other owners who properly maintain their bikes and are completely happy with their bike and experience few, if any problems. Some thrash the crap out of their XBs like they stole it and never have issues. Others baby their bikes, but experience gremlins. **** happens.
In my opinion, most of the issues/concerns you mentioned in your original post are rare on the XBs. There are some models in certain production years that exhibit problems to watch for or have items that should be upgraded if not already done on your bike, but overall, I think the XBs are mechanically well-designed and as maintenance-friendly as any other brand or model out there, if not more so. With the belt-drive and hydraulic lifters, just about all of the scheduled lube/adjustment maintenance items can be performed inexpensively by anyone with basic tools, and with most of the items taking an hour or less to do. The only exception might be the fork service, which some feel uncomfortable doing themselves, but it can easily be done yourself at a fraction of what HD charges, using borrowed or improvised tools.
If you want an XB, do a little research and learn what to look for and what questions to ask the seller. I suspect you won't spend as much money or time maintaining it as you think.